Episode 3: Rockin' Around The Christmas Treason

I post this author's note, currently, an hour after finishing the story. I just want to say that, more than even the last story, this one has been a Hell of a rollercoaster ride. There's been a lot of obnoxious family drama going on in my house for the past month, so it's been rather distracting trying to sit down and focus on writing every day. I had a pretty good schedule of getting a few hours done every night for the first couple of weeks, but things quickly spiraled out of control both IRL as well as in-story, with the actual story content becoming far more ambitious than I'd originally intended.

As a result...I feel as though the finished product is a bit of a clusterfuck of many different disjointed ideas and adventures. There's a lot going on here and it's pretty all over the place, though whether that's a good or a bad thing may depend on your personal preferences. I will say, however, that I cannot guarantee that this story is free from contradictions. I was pretty careful to double-check my facts with the previous stories to keep consistent with the IGNO Christmas lore, but there are probably a few things that don't seem to make perfect sense. and due to the chaotic environment I was struggling to write in, I worry there may even be contradictions within the story itself from one point or another (though I did have two proof-readers go through and help me out to varying degrees, neither of them was able to get through the full story).

So if something seems off, or you're confused about a particular detail, please - let me know. There's a very good chance I actually fucked something up and it's probably not just you.

Rockin' Around The Christmas Treason
By SG2

Rating: Is an 'official' rating even necessary anymore? If you're reading this, you should already know what to expect - crude humor, language, possible allusions to sexual content, shounen anime-tier violence, and general insanity going nearly overboard.

Attention: This story was written with the members of the IGNOLand forum members in mind, and contains numerous jokes and references that will likely make little sense to non-members. You are free to read it nonetheless, but don't be surprised if you wind up confused. The author of this story likes to abuse all manner of cliches, both of Christmas and general fiction, so any cheesiness and predictability is by intention. The writing will also very likely switch between past and present tense without warning because the author straight up gives no fucks.

Notes: It's that time again!! With the retcon of IGNOLand lore and adjustments to the previous two stories from last year, this story should now be considered the third official and canon Christmas Story. With that in mind, this is being written as the final installment of a trilogy, with A Crossmas Carol and Have Yourself A Dozen Little Christmases marking the previous two. As such, both of these stories - and especially Have Yourself A Dozen Little Christmases - are REQUIRED READING. This story is a direct sequel to the latter, and will not make much sense if you haven't read that yet, so do it. Do it now. NOW!! There are also references to the prologue story, Wintertide: A Documented History on IGNOLand's Christmas Traditions, but this is not inherently necessary for proper understanding.

That said…I'm doing something a little different with this one. The tone is probably going to veer a bit more towards the serious than some of you may be used to…and the closure of this particular trilogy will mark a significant change in the IGNO Christmas Canon as we know it. I've also got a bit of a gimmick planned, not quite as ambitious as last time (where I released a chapter at a time), but hopefully you'll enjoy it all the same. I'd like to say it won't be as long as the previous story, but as I typically just create a rough outline and then make up the bulk of the story as I go along, I can't really make any promises. It's December 1st as I begin, and I'd really like to have this done by the 20th at the latest so people can enjoy it at the height of their holiday spirit…but again, I tend to cut it very close with my deadlines on these things, so we'll see what happens. Y'all ready yet? Then let's get going!!

-Alex “SG2” Hoffman, 12/1/16

DISCLAIMER: I do not claim sole intellectual property over the characters or concepts referenced in Rockin' Around The Christmas Treason. The characters of SG2, Karma, Reese, Bones, xL, LG, Bradios, Tim, MTS, Atlas, Iris, Azaran and all others referenced are fictionally modified likenesses of their respective personages. Small references to How The Grinch Stole Christmas belong to Theodor “Dr. Seuss” Geisel. A large number of minor jokes and IGNO memes throughout this story may be references to other copyrighted material as well, and the author of this story does not take credit for their conception.

The story was not finished until December 24th, just shortly after midnight. It was very ambitious. I am a terrible, terribly judge of myself.